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"Life is a shit sandwich. But if you've got enough bread, you don't taste the shit."- Jonathan Winters
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"Life's like a novel with the end ripped out."- Danny Orton and Blair Daly
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"The world is a grindstone and life is your nose."- Fred Allen
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"Life is an incurable Disease."- Abraham Cowley
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"Why torture yourself when life'll do it for you?"- Unknown
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"Life is like an onion; you peel off layer after layer and then you find there is nothing in it."- James Gibbons Huneker
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"Life is just one damned thing after another."- Elbert Hubbard
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"Life sucks, but in a beautiful kind of way."- Axl Rose
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"Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then -- one day -- you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then -- one day -- you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe."- Denis Leary
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"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."- Albert Schweitzer
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